The Perfect Wife

Ha, this is what YearbookYourself.com did to me! This pic made me think about my previous post about having a Good Cook Personality that comes and goes. I thought this is what she would look like. Leesha Crocker!

I'm really struggling lately to be "the perfect wife". Laundry and dishes are taking over and my desk is stacked 1ft high. My whole life has turned upside down. Food is the core of life and when you make a change to what and how you eat, you really have to reprogram your life. I have recipes everywhere, cookbooks, and notes.. I'm constantly listening to podcasts and soaking up articles and videos. With this new constant learning I am really falling behind on all the things I normally do around the house. 

My husband currently works full time and goes to school full time. In the few hours he is at home I know he would love to have a yummy meal ready for him. And I- eagerly hoping to make something he might like, offer oven-friend Polenta Fries and roasted Eggplant. Yuck for him! It is getting very hard to balance what a strict vegetarian eats with what an omnivore expects to eat. I know that his "love language" is Acts of Service, especially food.. and I feel I am failing. 

On that note, I am reminded of the nearly impossible advice printed in Home-Ec textbooks in 1954, called "How to be a Good Wife". (I'm just wondering what manual the men were given with advice on How to be a good husband.. )

Ok, ladies, here's what the textbooks say: 

"Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal, on time. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they come home and the prospect of a good meal are part of the warm welcome needed.

 

Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so that you'll be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your makeup, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh-looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people. Be a little gay and a little more interesting. His boring day may need a lift.

 

Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the home just before your husband arrives, gather up schoolbooks, toys, paper, etc. Then run a dust cloth over the tables. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift, too.

 

Prepare the children. Take a few minutes to wash the children's hands and faces (if they are small), comb their hair, and if necessary change their clothes. They are little treasures and he would like to see them playing the part.

 

Minimize all noise. At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of the washer, dryer, dishwasher, or vacuum. Try to encourage the children to be quiet. Be happy to see him. Greet him with a warm smile and be glad he is home.

 

Some don'ts: Don't greet him with problems or complaints. Don't complain if he is late for dinner. Count this as minor compared with what he might have gone through that day. Make him comfortable. Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or suggest he lie down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him. Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soft, soothing and pleasant voice. Allow him to relax and unwind.

 

Listen to him. You may have a dozen things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first.

 

Make the evening his. Never complain if he does not take you out to dinner or to other places of entertainment. Instead, try to understand his world of strain and pressure, his need to be home and relax.

 

The Goal: Try to make your home a place of peace and order where your husband can renew himself in body and spirit."

 

Interestingly, I KNOW he would love these to happen.. my high-tech, open-minded, free-thinking, inventor and artist husband still wants a prepared meal, from a happy, pretty wife with no worries. Looks like much hasn't changed in the last 25 years of American society, and maybe there is a place for such advice.. with a grain of salt. (In my most sarcastic tone possible, "I think I'll try putting a ribbon in my hair")